When HBO broke the news that they would not be releasing the eighth and final season of Game of Thrones until 2019, it was left up to an unlikely Channel Seven to fill the void. Bronzed warriors and bitter foes, sweltering battles and unexpected kill-offs, cross-promotional endorsements to rival the most stomach-churning brother-on-sister incest scenes: it pleases me to say that after a fortnight of near round-the-clock drama, Game of Racquets (or, the ‘Australian Open’ to those purists who get their knickers in knot over the whole A Song of Ice and Fire thing) has re-established itself as the best binge-watch on TV.

At night-time, the river sounds like a dozen lanes of blackest highway bitumen.